Steamboats' Recovery Reading

To read the "Traits of Families of Incest and Child Abuse" and "Traits of Healthy Families" - click here.

Most important books on this subject:

betrayalofinnocence Betrayal of Innocence: Incest and Its Devastation by Susan Forward, Craig Buck. This is the best handbook on sexual abuse of children and a good starting place. It's concise, well-written, compassionate, insightful, and full of information. Even though it's been in print for decades, it is still the best book available.

breakingdownthewall Breaking Down the Wall of Silence: The Liberating Experience of Facing Painful Truth by Alice Miller, Simon Worrall (Translator). Synopsis: The culture that ignores roots of hatred and tyranny embedded in its own childrearing traditions, warns Miller, renders itself ripe for payback. Her analyses of the likes of Hitler and Nicolae Ceausescu lend epic significance to her point. . . . She calls on society at large to condemn poisonous methods of discipline and, with the eloquence of a survivor, points the way to a liberating awareness for victims whose past still exerts a devastating grip. . . . Acclaimed psychotherapist Alice Milller continues her study of the roots and results of child abuse. Drawing on her own experience (and that of her patients), Dr. Miller describes the systematic way in which evidence of child abuse has been ignored, repressed, and ultimately dismissed as untrue by doctors, parents, and even the victims. She advocated getting access to and articulating loong-denied emotions so that healing may take place.

thoushaltnotbeaware Thou Shalt Not Be Aware: Society's Betrayal of the Child by Alice Miller, Hildegarde Hannum (Translator), Hunter Hannum (Translator)
Amazon synopsis: This groundbreaking classic of child-rearing, originally published in 1984, exploded Freud's notions of "infantile sexuality" and helped bring to the world's attention the brutal reality of child abuse.
Steamboats' review: This is an excellent book and stands out among the others with a fresh, new ideas. Read this one along with The Power of Myth, by Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers, or The Cry for Myth, by Rollo May. If you accept Miller's ideas, it will point out exactly why child abuse happens and what to do about it.

Also search all the writings of Alice Miller. Besides these two (above), she has many more. Good reading, good information.


The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse, by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis.

The Courage to Heal Workbook, For Women and Men Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse, by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis.

This is another classic book, but still one of the best. The Workbook is great if writing would help you heal from abuse.

More child abuse titles:

To Punish and Protect: A DA's Fight Against a System That Coddles Criminals by Jeanine Pirro (Author), Catherine Whitney (Author)
Review from Publishers Weekly
Westchester County District Attorney Pirro, writing with Whitney, declares her hatred of violent crime and brutal criminals in this book of essays. After nearly 30 years as a prosecutor, Pirro sees herself at the center of a battleground of good vs. evil; she has no doubt of her rectitude. She and her assistants are the avengers who seek justice on behalf of crime victims, often ignored or marginalized by the criminal justice system. The book's chapters focus on the most horrific imaginable crimes, from sexual predation directed against children to spousal murder, from elder abuse to hate crimes. For each type of atrocity, Pirro cites examples drawn from her prosecutorial experience.

Overcoming Childhood Sexual Trauma: A Guide to Breaking Through the Wall of Fear for Practitioners and Survivors (Paperback) by Sheri Oz, Sarah-Jane Ogiers (author's website:"
Authoring a Life: A Woman's Survival in and Through Literay Studies by Brenda O. Daly
Breaking the Silence: Art Therapy With Children from Violent Homes, by Cathy A. Malchiodi
Heal and Forgive: Forgiveness in the Face of Abuse, by Nancy Richards, foreword by Rev. Dr. Marie M. Fortune


Those are MY Private Parts
by Diane Hansen. Editorial Review, School Library Journal, excerpt:
PreSchool-Grade 3AA picture book that clearly instructs children on how to deal with unwanted and inappropriate touching through a heart-to-heart talk between a little boy and his mother. The author sensitively distinguishes between the loving touch we all need and "secret, deceptive, or forced touching." Children are encouraged to listen to their own feelings, assert their right to stop unwanted contact, and get help from trusted adults "even if it is supposed to be a secret." An informative foreword to adults gives valuable information on communicating personal safety to children and advice for helping those who report abuse.

Other sex education books
Ten Talks Parents Must Have with Their Children About Sex and Character by Pepper Schwartz and Dominic Cappello S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Progressive Sexuality Guide to Get You Through High School and College by Heather Corinna

Other books to prevent child abuse:
The Right Touch: A Read-Aloud Story to Help Prevent Child Sexual Abuse by Sandy Kleven
Your Body Belongs to You by Cornelia Maude Spelman
My Body Is Private by Linda Walvoord Girard
Amazing You: Getting Smart About Your Private Parts by Gail Saltz
It's My Body (Children's Safety & Abuse Prevention) by Lory Freeman
Who Is a Stranger and What Should I Do? by Linda Walvoord Girard
I Never Told Anyone: Writings by Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse
Just A Boy: The True Story of A Stolen Childhood
Betrayal of Innocence
Dibs in Search of Self
The Body Never Lies: The Lingering Effects of Cruel Parenting
Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation: Skills Training for Patients and Therapists
Outgrowing the Pain: A Book for and About Adults Abused As Children
Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life
Overcoming Childhood Sexual Trauma: A Guide to Breaking Through the Wall of Fear for Practitioners and Survivors
Authoring a Life: A Woman's Survival in and Through Literary Studies
The Right Touch: A Read-Aloud Story to Help Prevent Child Sexual Abuse (Jody Bergsma Collection)
Multiple personality and dissociation: Understanding incest, abuse, and MPD
More Creative Interventions for Troubled Children and Youth
The Anger Habit in Relationships: A Communication Workbook for Relationships, Marriages and Partnerships
Angry All the Time: An Emergency Guide to Anger Control
Multiple Personality and Dissociation: Understanding Incest, Abuse, and Mpd
Healing the Inner Child - Let Go of the Past and Move Forward Using Nlp and Hypn
Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship

Cult recovery books that visitors to this site have purchased:
Hypnotizing Maria
Betrayal of the Spirit: My Life behind the Headlines of the Hare Krishna Movement
Cartwheels in a Sari: A Memoir of Growing Up Cult
Untied: A Memoir of Family, Fame, and Floundering
Blinded by Might
Monkey on a Stick: Murder and Madness and the Hare Krishnas
Servant of the Lotus Feet: A Hare Krishna Odyssey
Feet of Clay: Saints, Sinners, and Madmen: A Study of Gurus
Hare Krishna in America
Hare Krishna Transformed (New and Alternative Religions)
The Hare Krishna Book of Vegetarian Cooking
Losing the Way: A Memoir of Spiritual Longing, Manipulation, Abuse, and Escape
Miracle on Second Avenue: Hare Krishna Arrives in New York, San Francisco, and London 1966-1969
The Higher Taste: A Guide to Gourmet Vegetarian Cooking and a Karma-Free Diet
The Serpent Rising: A Journey Of Spiritual Seduction
Inside the Hare Krishna Movement: An Ancient Eastern Religious Tradition Comes of Age in the Western World
Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships
Losing the Way: A Memoir of Spiritual Longing, Manipulation, Abuse, and Escape
Jesus Freaks: A True Story of Murder and Madness on the Evangelical Edge
Hare Krishna Transformed (The New and Alternative Religions Series)
Cult Survivors Handbook: How to Live in the Material World Again
Spiritual Summer . . . and other short stories
Mad After Krishna: My Life in a Destructive Cult
Child of the Cult

General Psychology books that visitors to this site have purchased:
Gestalt Therapy: Excitement and Growth in the Human Personality
From Conflict to Resolution: Skills and Strategies for Individual, Couple, and Family Therapy
Identity and the Life Cycle
On Becoming a Person: A Therapist's View of Psychotherapy
Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
The Complete Adult Psychotherapy Treatment Planner (Practice Planners)
Open Minded: Working Out the Logic of the Soul
Person-Centred Counselling in Action (Counselling in Action series)
Couple Skills: Making Your Relationship Work
Say Goodbye to Being Shy: A Workbook to Help Kids Overcome Shyness
Being with Dying: Cultivating Compassion and Fearlessness in the Presence of Death
First Steps in Counselling

More Childhood Abuse Recovery Titles

Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to Do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life -- Dr. Patricia Love, et al; Paperback

Behind Closed Doors in White South America: Incest Survivors Tell Their Stories Diana E. H. Russell(Editor), Jo Campling (Editor) / Paperback / Published 1997

Father-Daughter Incest -- Judith Herman; Paperback

Breaking Free: A Self-Help Guide for Adults Who Were Sexually Abused As Children Carolyn Ainscough, Kay Toon / Paperback / Published 1993

Breaking the Silence: A Personal Story of Incest and Recovery Melody Platt / Paperback

A Parent's & Teacher's Handbook on Identifying and Preventing Child Abuse, by James A. Monteleone, M.D., G.W. Medical Publishing.

Coping With Incest (Coping Series) Deborah A. Miller, Pat Kelly / Library Binding / Published 1995

Door of Hope: Recognizing and Resolving the Pains of Your Past Jan Frank / Paperback / Published 1995

Fault Lines: Incest, Sexuality and Catholic Family Culture Tish Langlois / Paperback / Published 1997

From Surviving to Thriving: Incest, Feminism and Recovery (The Psychology of Women) Christine Dinsmore / Paperback / Published 1991

Ghosts in the Bedroom: A Guide for Partners of Incest Survivors Ken Graber / Paperback / Published 1991

Healing the Incest Wound: Adult Survivors in Therapy Christine A. Courtois / Hardcover / Published 1988

Healing the Whole: The Diary of an Incest Survivor (Cassells Sexual Politics) Yvette M. Pennacchia / Paperback / Published 1995

The Hidden Legacy: Uncovering, Confronting and Healing Three Generations of Incest Barbara Small Hamilton, Bruce Robinson (Editor) / Paperback / Published 1994

The Hostage Child: Sex Abuse Allegations in Custody Disputes Leora N. Rosen, Michelle Etlin (Contributor) / Hardcover / Published 1996

Just Before Dawn Jan Hindman / Paperback / Published 1989

The Mother I Carry: A Memoir of Healing from Emotional Abuse Louise M. Wisechild / Paperback / Published 1993

The Mother's Book: How to Survive the Molestation of Your Child Carolyn Byerly / Paperback / Published 1997

Mothers of Incest Survivors: Another Side of the Story Janis Tyler Johnson / Paperback / Published 1992

Naming the Shadows: A New Approach to Individual and Group Psychotherapy for Adult Survivors of Childhood Incest Susan, Phd Roth, Ronald Batson (Contributor) / Hardcover / Published 1997

Sex in the Therapy Hour: A Case of Professional Incest Carolyn M. Bates, Annette M. Brodsky (Contributor) / Paperback / Published 1993

Sexual Abuse and Incest (Teen Issues) Dale Robert Reinert / Library Binding / Published 1997

Sexually Victimized Children David Finkelhor / Paperback / Published 1981

Silently Seduced: When Parents Make Their Children Partners: Understanding Covert Incest - Kenneth M. Adams / Paperback / Published 1991

Sixteen Voices: Poets: Survivors of Incest & Sexual Abuse Paperback / Published 1994

Victimized Daughters: Incest and the Development of the Female Self Janet Liebman Jacobs / Paperback / Published 1994

Victims No Longer: Men Recovering from Incest and Other Sexual Child Abuse Mike Lew, Ellen Bass / Paperback / Published 1990

Voices in the Night: Women Speaking About Incest Toni Ah McNaron (Editor), Yarrow Morgan (Editor) / Paperback / Published 1982

Beating the Devil Out of Them, Corporal Punishment in American Families, by Murray A. Straus, University of New Hampshire Family Research Lab.

Child Abuse (The Family) Jonathan Bliss / Library Binding / Published 1990

What to do when a parents love rules your life

Axline, V.M. Play Therapy. New York: Ballantine Books, 1947.

A Secret World: Sexuality And The Search For Celibacy, by A.W. Richard Sipe. Former priest surveys priests on celibacy and presents findings that very few priests are 100% celibate.

Berry, Jason. Lead Us Not Into Temptation, Catholic Priests and the Sexual Abuse of Children. New York: Doubleday, 1992.

Brinton Perera, Sylvia. The Scapegoat Complex, Toward a Mythology of Shadow and Guilt. Toronto: Inner City Books, 1986.

Corbett, Lionel. The Religious Function of the Psyche. New York: Routledge, 1996.

Davis, Laura. The Courage to Heal Workbook, For Women and Men Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse. New York: Harper & Row, Publishers, 1990.

Forward, Susan & Buck, Craig. Betrayal of Innocence: Incest and Its Devastation. San Francisco: Penguin Books, 1988 (rev. ed).

Hubner, John, & Gruson, Lindsey Monkey on a Stick, Murder, Madness, and the Hare Krishnas. San Diego: harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1988.

Johnson, Robert A. Owning Your Own Shadow: Understanding the Dark Side of the Psyche. San Francisco: Harper San Francisco, 1991.

Jung, Carl (ed.). Man and his Symbols. New York: Doubleday & Company, Inc., 1964.

May, Rollo. The Cry for Myth. New York: Bantam Doubleday Dell Publishing Group, Inc., 1991.

Miller, Alice. Breaking Down the Wall of Silence. New York: Meridian, 1993.

Miller, Alice. Thou Shalt Not Be Aware, Society's Betrayal of the Child. New York: Meridian, 1990.

Moacanin, Radmila. Jung's Psychology and Tibetan Buddhism, Western and Eastern Paths to the Heart. Boston: Wisdom Publications, 1986.

Oaklander, Virginia. Windows to Our Children: A Gestalt Therapy Approach to Children and Adolescents. Moab, UT: Real People Press, 1978.

Pryor, Douglas W. Unspeakable Acts: Why Men Sexually Abuse Children. New York: New York University Press, 1996.

Shengold, Leonard. Soul Murder, The Effects of Childhood Abuse and Deprivation. New York: Fawcett Columbine, 1989.

Sipe, Richard A.W. A Secret World: Sexuality and the Search for Celibacy. New York: Brunner/Mazel, Publishers, 1990.

Strauss, Murray A. Beating the Devil Out of Them, Corporal Punishment in American Families. New York: Lexington Books, 1994.


The Secret of Overcoming Verbal Abuse: Getting Off the Emotional Roller Coaster and Regaining Control of Your Life by Marcia Grad Powers and Dr. Albert Ellis, Ph.D.
Applies rational-emotive therapy to stop the cycle of verbal abuse. The best book on the subject.

Click here for more information on child abuse

Click here to go to the Parenting Workshop